The Lawyer's brother is graduating from medical school in two weeks, though, and as previously mentioned, I find his family hilarious. So, with this in mind, I explained to The Lawyer that the orchidometer would be a fabulous graduation gag gift.
For those of you who don't want to blind yourself with the visual on Wikipedia (consider yourselves warned!), an orchidometer is this necklace sort of thing with different sized "beads" that's used by endocrinologists to measure testicular size.
via Google Images
Anyway, The Lawyer's brother is going into family medicine, so I could totally rationalize my way out of this if The Lawyer's parents are appalled at the tasteless and inappropriate girlfriend who gives their youngest son dirty graduation gifts.
But...
Where the heck do I find one of these things? Do medical supply stores have them? The only places I can find it are in China or the UK, and they're like, $90! I'm willing to be a little bit more generous for a good joke, but $90 is kind of steep.
The Lawyer has suggested both that I make an orhcidometer myself with craft supplies from Michael's (a regular comedian I'm dating) or that I buy some sort of ethnic prayer beads instead, because they "look almost the same."
Any real suggestions?
11 comments:
Amazon let me down! So disappointing.
OMDG- I know!!! I was incredulous...Amazon has everything!
Hold on, I'm going to ask Doc H if he has one. When he asks why, I'm going to tell him to lie down and point his heels to the sky.
Amazon failed and I found the one for $90 on Ebay. Man that sucks!
I totally would try what the Lawyer suggest and make your own. Find some different glass beads or some oval shaped rocks and get to drilling a small hole through each one and put it on a necklace and call it good. BUT you being so busy and all do you really have the time? Hahaha, of course you do, you love to multitask!
YDW- Ahahahaha! The Lawyer literally acted as if he had been blinded when he saw the photo on Wikipedia. Me thinks men are a little sensitive when discussing their man parts. :)
Zazzy- The time constraint of Boards studying is really the obstacle to making a fake one. I also thought it would be cool if I gave him a real one, just in case he actually had use for it one day. (And, the true nerd EMERGES!) I think it's so funny that this thing is so hard to find. Endocrinologists, where do you get your medical supplies?!!
Ask SHU. She's an pediatric endo fellow. And I know she showed a photo of one in an entry on her blog a while back.
http://www.theshubox.com/
She had a baby recently - so all her recent posts are baby related - (blech - another mommy blog - not my thing - started reading it when she was writing about her med school/residency experiences)
Elle- Ooh, thanks for the tip! I just emailed her!
You know whats funny about the wikipedia page though? It's a guy measuring his OWN testicle--rather than a doctor doing it...or maybe he IS a doctor. hahaha.
I'd get him this one. It isn't as funny looking, but scary. If I was a guy I would not want scissor looking things going near my balls.
http://www.uromed.eu/englisch/products/katalog/int/0/instrumentelles-zubehoer/orchidometer-nach-schirren.html
What a hilarious idea for a gift!
Elena- Bwahaha! I didn't even think about that, but yes, why is the guy measuring his own testicles?!!! (Goljan would say that he's clearly using steroids...)
Brittles15- Oh em gee. That thing is just scary looking! Don't close it in too much, huh?!
MS3- Haha...thanks! Hopefully...I never know how parentals will react to these things.
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