As of this morning, I had not heard from Charlie, regarding our dinner date tomorrow night.
Of course, none of you are shocked by this. It’s not like we’re dealing with Neighbor Guy, with his sweet emails containing Washingtonian restaurant reviews, personal thoughts about the chef, and plans after-dinner date activities. This is Charlie, the commitment-phobic compulsive emailer, whose face I have not seen since October, but whose email word count is probably in the millions by now.
For our first failed attempt at lunch, I had suggested two restaurants to Charlie that were in walking distance of the medical school, but I asked him to choose a time (within a window) and make the reservation for us. Why? Because Charlie needs training. I'm purposely making him do the legwork of planning the date. I'm also expecting him to pick me up and to pay--not things I necessarily demand from others--because I know that he's playing games with me and that comes at a price.
Once upon a time, I found Charlie's dating tendencies fascinating and entertaining. But last night, I decided that if Charlie did not contact me by 2 p.m. today with the name of a restaurant, the time we were eating, and an offer to pick me up, I was going to cancel on him. I'm a big fan of non-medical distractions to keep me sane, but not of people wasting my precious time.
Well, Charlie emailed around 11 a.m. to ask if I’ll be in Virginia tomorrow night. I presumed that he was asking, because he was now (the day before) in the process of planning dinner. So, I sent a quick reply saying yes, I would be in Virginia and went to class. I expected to open my email and find the date plan waiting for me when I got finished. Except...there is nothing there. And, this date is supposed to be going down in 24 hours or so.
I do get excited by the prospect of witty conversation and someone to apprise me of what's going on in the outside world, but we already know that Charlie is way below my standards. I should have just let the pink elephant stand and ignore the fact that our original lunch date played out in such an awkward way.
The question now is, do I just cancel or ignore Charlie's obvious ineptitude and let this play out for its (rapidly fading) entertainment value? I'm leaning towards the former.
7 comments:
Meh. At this point, see if he contacts you. If he does, and has made reservations, go and eat with him. Have fun. Worst case scenario you get a free meal. Don't bring your wallet in case he "forgets" his.
If he doesn't contact you, do NOT contact him. Pretend this never happened, and go out to dinner with some friends tomorrow night so you can talk about what a tool he is.
If I were you, I'd forget about the plans tomorrow, and if he gets back about meeting, just go for the sake of keeping your word. Then, after that, decline any further requests. He's clearly not worthy of the Great You.
Thanks for the advice, ladies. As if on cue, he emailed as I was posting this.
My advice (and trust me that I have extensive experience in dating, getting engaged, calling off a wedding and getting engaged again on the date that would have been my original wedding date...to a different man) is that you seem to appreciate a person who puts more time and consideration into spending time with you. Charlie doesn't sound like he is that type of guy. Just saying.
What about neighbour guy? Is it time to re-visit things with him?
Hey Penelope!
You are right about me. Unfortunately, I'm 90% certain that Neighbor Guy is gay. He also wanted me to commit to a serious relationship with him on the second date, which I found to be way too much pressure too soon.
So will you be doing dinner then? I see he already e-mailed you, but I have no patience for crap like that. I would've gone on to plan something else.
That could also play a part in why I've been single for 2 years.
Hmmmm....
Dude -- Go out with neighbor guy again and don't commit if you don't want to! You can still date him even if he wants to take things faster than you do. The one who likes the other one less is the one with the control.
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